Two Bits

Shanel thinks she’s fat; I think I’m fat. For that matter, nearly every woman I know thinks she’s fat. Now comes the latest news on the diet front from the New York Times: “In a tightly controlled dieting experiment, obese people lost an average of just 6 to 10 pounds over two years.”

(<www.nytimes.com/2008/07/17/health/nutrition/17diets.html>) Now to be fair, the article does go on to say that even modest loses such as these have long-term health benefits, but gee whiz! Even though I have (ample) evidence to the contrary, I still had hopes for dropping 10 to 15 by tomorrow, and I have clothes in my closet to prove it!!!!

It makes very good evolutionary sense for those extra pounds to stick like glue, of course, but that doesn’t improve my disposition. The fact that my existence is probably due to my ancestors’ ability to make the most of every calorie does not compensate for the fact that I cannot expect a metamorphosis into today’s ideal of feminine beauty. Reminding myself that only 1,000 years ago, women in France wore bands around their necks to encourage that attractive double chin does no good at all.

I talk a good game – I say that what I’m really interested in is good health, and the ability to enjoy the things I want to do, but it’s a bald-faced lie. What I really want is to be attractive. Really attractive. Really, Really, Really attractive. I somehow believe that if I were a 10 (a 9 ½ probably wouldn’t cut it), all my faults would disappear. Nearly 60 years old, and I still subscribe to that fallacy.

Unfortunately, I think that a good deal of this is hard-wired – men are from Mars, women are from

Venus; men are judged on success, women are judged on attractiveness. This also makes very good sense from an evolutionary standpoint. A powerful, successful man can protect and provide for a woman’s offspring, and an attractive woman (i.e., someone who is young and fertile) can produce them.

If I were 10 pounds thinner, would I have more first dates? Probably. More second dates? I expect so. A better chance at a long-term, healthy relationship? I’m not so sure about that.